On Brushing Hair

This morning I woke up quite tired from a restless night's sleep, and wasn't in the greatest of moods to start with. Then I came upon THIS lovely article online.

It is a Cafe Mom article written in judgement of an AP blogger who goes by Nothing By The Book.

Allow me to explain what is going on here. The original article by Nothing By The Book is about how she will not brush her children's hair if they tell her no. She respects that it's their body and that they should have control over it. It's simply hair: an attachment to their head that-in my words, not hers-society puts waaaaaaaay too much stock into. It's a lovely read if you're interested, you can find it HERE.

The article on The Stir delves right in about judging the mother for being very over the top:

"Oh. My. Word. Have you heard about the mom who refuses to brush her kids' hair unless the kids want it brushed?"

 It is followed by the author explaining that she is all for teaching her daughter that her body is her own, but will absolutely force her to brush her hair, even bragging about forcing her child to sit still for 17 minutes simply for the sake of brushing because

"-I'm her parent, I'm not sexually abusing her by brushing her hair, and some things are non-negotiable."

Alrighty. Clearly you only skimmed the blog. Let me expound by quoting an  excerpt:

 "Their wild, messy hair? Part of the lesson that they’re learning that no one—not me, not nice Mr. Jones down the street, not that creepy dude in the park, and not their first, over-eager boyfriend—has a right to do anything to their bodies that they don’t want them to do.

This is a lesson our children need to learn, repeatedly, while they are close enough to us that they will learn it, hear it.

But we don’t teach it with words. We don’t teach it with scary lectures or with fear.

We teach with how we treat their bodies. From their nose to their toes, and all the parts in-between."

We do not teach with words, we teach with how we, as their parents, treat their bodies.

You can tell your daughter or son that they are the only ones with rights to their bodies until you're blue in the face. If what you say is "Only you have rights." but what you DO shouts "You only have rights until I disagree, then your rights are gone while I do as I wish because I'm the boss of you." you are sending a horribly mixed message.

"Come on! Kids don't like everything we attempt to do to them, but that doesn't mean you give in."

Yes. It does. Unless someone's life is in danger don't do something to them. Do something for or with them Or if they ask for help for example, brushing their hair, then help. Don't tell a child, "Yes, this is your body no one has the right to touch you anywhere you don't want them to. Sit back down! I need to finish brushing your hair. I don't care if it hurts, do what I told you to do!"

Teaching your kids about personal hygiene and how to complete hygiene tasks followed by allowing them to see you performing these tasks each day is how children learn what is important. Not by telling them to do it and forcing them to comply no matter what else is said or done. It's not your body, it's not your choice. Show them the good path and remind them often. Don't shove them down it and lock the gate behind them.

*sigh* I have so much more to say but Tiny Hunter is asleep in my arms which makes typing very ridiculous. Leave your comments below, and follow us on Facebook.

The Secret to Getting More Milk

I am a breastfeeding mama. As hard as that has been for all of my family to finally accept, now that Tiny Hunter is 10 months old and still hardly touches solid food I think they get the picture. 

But this post is about more than that. When Tiny was about two and a half months old I went back to work. I worked in the deli at a grocery store, and I liked my co-workers and boss very much. It was confusing to them that I needed time to pump however. In a job where a single 15 minute break in an 8 hour shift was considered normal, my needing to pump every 2-3 hours for 20 minutes was baffling to them. (We were never told not to take more breaks or that we could only take 15 instead of 30, it was simply what everyone already did and new workers either got used to it or had shorter hours the next week.) Tiny Hunter was also having a hard time adjusting. While he would eat from the bottle, he was acting as if he was extremely hungry all the time and having horrible gas problems according to Great Hunter. After three weeks, GH picked up a 6th shift at work each week and I came home full time.

Fast forward to today. Right now, I am about to go back to work. GH's job greatly depends on "snowbirds" all of which are gone right now. I have been offered a position that will allow GH to come home full time and go to school part time, but I will be working 40 hours each week, and driving an hour each day as well. This means pumping. A lot of pumping. I have been preparing for this however. I have been pumping for about two weeks now and have a week left to save up as well.

There was a problem however. This:

This wonderful half of an ounce is all I could get, two times each day. One ounce total a day over two weeks is only 14 ounces. Not nearly enough for one work shift. 

I made and ate lactation cookies, three different recipes with up to triple the amount of brewer's yeast. 

I ate oatmeal every morning, with an over medium egg covered in a full tablespoon of fennel seeds. 

I drank six cups of mother's milk tea each day. 

A full gallon of water every 24 hours.

I took 4 of the 620mg fenugreek pills, four times a day.

I took two teaspoons of  FCLO each day.

I made an organic fruit and veggie smoothie with one of every color (ROYGBIV) plus 2 tablespoons each of chia and flax seeds plus a tablespoon of coconut oil.

AND I took the "More Milk Plus" tincture from MotherLove, the dose for women 175+ pounds even though I only weigh 130. 

All of this AT THE SAME TIME.

I was pumping every hour for half an hour, after offering my son a nurse. and I mean 24/7 for a full week. I tried different flanges, replaced seals and hoses, and did breast compressions like a mad woman.

I felt full. I felt as if I had to be producing more milk because none of my bras would fit. I wasn't leaking, but I felt full. Still, an ounce a day is all I was getting. 

Today I was about to give up hope. I was truly about to cry. I wanted to swing my pump around by the hoses and smash my bathroom mirror with it, when Tiny Hunter toddled over to me.

He did something I have read about and scoffed at a hundred times over. He squeezed my boob. Milk shot everywhere. Thinking it was hilarious, he sat down and did it again. Same result: milk fountain, giggling baby.

I suddenly started squeezing my boobs in a million different ways. I used one hand, two hands (while balancing a bottle with flange between my knees) or just my thumb and index finger to squeeze my breasts. Finally after a couple of minutes I was able to figure out that squeezing from the base of my breast down to the nipple one finger at a time worked on the right while using one hand to compress and the other hand to squeeze worked on the left(larger) side.

The results:

I got as much in 20 minutes as I had been getting in TWO DAYS. There is nearly two and a half ounces right there. I also noticed another pivotal difference. Instead of having a blue almost watery hue like everything I've pumped before, this milk was thick and a deep white almost yellow color. Hindmilk. Or, at least a good mix instead of straight foremilk.

Tiny Hunter was suffering when I tried going back to work before because he was getting mostly water and not very much of the good stuff. I recognize that now.

I plan to go back to work next week with great determination. I will be pumping for ten minutes to remove all of the foremilk that will build up over the 2&1/2 hours I have between each break and then hand express until empty for the rest. I can do this.

YOU CAN DO THIS.

I am writing this to encourage moms to learn how to hand express. Don't just try one way and then give up. Watch a video to get a good idea, but really do as many things as it takes to find out what works best for you. Message me for encouragement or tips, and really have faith. <3

Thank you for sharing with me today!!

Huntress